Day 5-Happiness is…a momentary lapse of reality

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Anne : “I can’t help but be lifted up on the wings of anticipation…as glorious as soaring through a sunset…almost pace for the thud.”

Marilla: “I’d rather walk calmly along with both feet on the ground and do without both flying and thud.”

~ Anne of Green Gables

I admire Marilla. I reluctantly admit to being head-in-the-clouds Anne.

Today was supposed to be for organizing finances. This task did not happen. Not one bit of it. Anne wouldn’t have done it either.

Executively deciding finances could wait and work could not, I set myself a big list. (Self-employment means no-one actually decided you would be good at this job except you. Does anyone else see the flaw in this plan?)

I did not set time parameters, forgot to schedule in dinner and bus stop pick ups, left a mess in the kitchen and my room, and did not complete half the things on my list. Everything I started led to another task and round and round it went.

THUD.

I believe that the things we don’t tolerate from others are the very things we actually dislike about ourselves.

For instance, my children annoy me when they procrastinate, don’t organize their time well, forget things, or leave a mess when it would take just a few minutes to clean up. I come down on them for it; I want them to be better than me.

So…is it better to have high expectations, to reach for lofty goals and risk disappointment, OR… to set low expectations and feel elated when you invariably surpass your goals? Which way actually gets you farther ahead?

I recently read that visualizing your fairy tale perfect life is detrimental because it sets you up for disappointment in reality.** What constitutes reality?

If I want someone to know I’m not perfect in reality, but to believe I am perfect for them,and vise versa, is that settling? What constitutes settling? If you are happy does it matter? What constitutes happy?

“Happiness is fine but it’s momentary,

a momentary lapse of reality.

Reality is fine, for the moment it can wait,

I’m addicted to the chase of my happiness.”

~ Illy

This blog feels about as organized as my day. I got to the end and I’m not sure what the point was. Every answer begins the chase of new question. And round and round it goes…

Anne chased things out of her reach and ignored reality. In the process she had many flying adventures (often unintentional), and many thuds. She was happy in the end, but then so was Marilla.

On the other hand, they were both a work of fiction.

___________________________________________________________________________

So… it has come to this!

As long as my accountant doesn’t read this there’s no harm done.  

For the moment finances can wait…

Rating: Organizing Finances Day – (5 out of 10)

  • Itchy Feet – 3 out of 5 (I’m Anne…words thrill me, not finances… but I do like to organize and accomplish a goal)
  • Twitch – maybe I should see a doctor…
  • Happy hour – 2 out of 5 (it’s hardly fair as I never even began the task, but I ended up feeling discouraged at what I didn’t get done)

What the heck does all that mean, you ask? Click here to get to the ‘Happiness Is…?’ page. You’ll find out why I’m doing this and if you scroll towards bottom of the page you can read about the rating system.

Tomorrow: Smile excessively. Use the calendar to view my happiness tasks for each day along with a brief description of the task and why I chose it.

** 59 seconds, Think a little, Change a Lot by Richard Wiseman

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7 responses »

  1. This just in…”While you’re busy looking for the perfect person, you might just miss the imperfect person who could make you perfectly happy.” Love it when I hear my own thoughts repeated back, but better.

  2. What is reality? Reality is an illusion.

    Well, from our human perspective it is, since the reality we comprehend is the reality our brain can perceive through our senses. And interpretation of electrical signals. Our perception of our reality IS our reality. Perception.

    Since our reality relies on our perspective and perception, reality will be different from my point of view than from yours. So which one of us knows the REAL reality? Neither. And both.

    When I see blue, my brain interprets that wavelength of light and constructs a picture. Does blue to you look just like blue does to me? Probably not. If I saw the picture your brain paints, the colours would probably be all messed up from my point of view. Certainly, people who can’t tell the difference between red and green don’t see the world the same as I do. But it’s just as real. At least, as real as any other illusion.

    The good news that derives from this is: Change your perception and you change your reality.

    Of couse that doesn’t mean if we ignore our finances, then all the financial problems will go away. Pretending something isn’t there doesn’t make it so. But how we choose to understand our reality makes it so.

    For instance, there are no inherently good or bad events. There are only events. What makes them good or bad is our understanding or perspective or perception.

    Some people see a sunny day and get excited. I get annoyed that the bright light is in my eyes. Some people see an overcast day and get depressed. I see great tennis weather, as long as there’s not a bunch of wind. But then my wife loves the wind. So none of these weather patterns are good or bad in and of themselves, but our response to it makes it so – for us.

    Many of the things we perceive as positive or negative are hard-wired and trying to pretend we feel differently than we do isn’t healthy. But I think there are lots of times where we could reinterpret something as good if we stepped back and adjusted our perception. And I think there are lots of times that we miss the good things going on all around us because we can’t see past the bad thing that we’re focussed on.

    So is happiness a momentary lapse of reality? No. When we’re happy, that IS reality. At least our reality. At that time. Until our perception of reality shifts again.

  3. Pingback: Day 8-Happiness is … carrot farts « 365waystobehappy

  4. Pingback: Day 4-Happiness is…being an ostrich « 365waystobehappy

  5. Pingback: Day 16-Happiness is … sidling in big boots toward the honey pot « 365waystobehappy

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