Day 21-Happiness is … all in your head


“The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality.” – Brandon B.

Adoree Durayappah's 3P Model of Happiness

Adoree Durayappah's 3P Model of Happiness (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Is it better for reality to be the dream or the dream to be reality? How often do you use some form of reality avoidance?

I’m sure there are many creative ways to put off reality, but today I decided on a guilt free diet of fantasizing, (or cognitive distortion), in order  to test the theory that an essential ingredient of true happiness is a lack of everything we want.

Disclaimer: Do not attempt full scale cognitive distortions while driving, talking on the phone with an ex, or performing your duties at a job you need to keep.

These restrictions limited my dream time, but the basic idea was to fill up on fantasy and leave no room for negative reality. Whatever I felt I was lacking, I imagined I actually had it.

  • Feeling lonely? – Simply imagine someone waiting at home to rub my feet and ask how my day was.
  • Feeling tired? –  Simply imagine millions of dollars and only working because I love it so much – oh, and a private jet to the beaches of Fiji.
  • On the outside my car may have looked ordinary, but on the inside I was driving a Porsche.
  • Did I mention my private chef?

It was fun for a while, but in the end it was like trying to fill up on popcorn. Perhaps the fun would last longer if the dream was reality, but I’ve decided my reality is my dream.

If I had everything I wanted handed over on a platter, I would feel cheated out of the experience of the journey. I want the feeling of satisfaction that I earned, owned, and cooked whatever dish is filling my happy bowl.

Disclaimer: As with any good diet, some cheating is essential to success 🙂 

PS- I may have been hungry when I wrote this…at this very moment I am cognitively distorting about apple fritters.


So…it has come to this !

If everyone in the world threw all their problems into a pile for exchange, I’d bet that most of us would pick our own problems back out of that pile instead of taking on anyone else’s. 

Rating: Fantasizing day (7 out of 10)

  • Itchy feet – 4 out of 5 (Was pretty excited about allowing myself a different life for a day)
  • Twitch – have it
  • Happy hour – 3 out of 5 (George and Brad fighting over me upped the score)

What the heck does all that mean, you ask? Read Itchy Feet Explained.

Tomorrow: Compliment everyone. Use the calendar to view my happiness tasks for each day along with a brief description of the task and why I chose it.


One response »

  1. You should try video games. Something with a strong narrative. Escapist fantasy that can interact back with you to some degree.

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